Thou hast made me known to friends whom I knew not.

Thou hast given me seats in homes not my own.

Thou hast brought the distant near and made a brother of the stranger.

----Tagore

One aspect of this experience that has really amazed me is the amount of support out there for adoptive families! FCC (Families with Children from China) is a nationwide support group that offers cultural learning, play groups, etc for adoptive families, and I have had the opportunity to meet amazing people right here in Atlanta, who are in the same process and on a very similar time line. I have joined fabric swaps (for the 100 good wishes quilt) and secret pal groups, and lunch groups and dinner groups! I have joined several online discussion groups, including APC, which allows you to "chat" with 15,000 members from all over the world---all china adoption---all the time. Very cool.

So, thanks to all the wonderful people that I have met both online and in my own community who have made the beginnings of my journey so extraordinary. Your support has meant the world to me, and I look forward to following this exotic, breathless, sometimes frustrating path with you.

Referrals should be here any day ---Think I'll kick back and cheer them on with "15,000 of my closest friends"!

Dossier to China!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like cold water to a weary soul, is good news from a distant land.

----Proverbs 25:25

I stumbled into work this morning, coffee in hand, ready for an average Friday.

But Lo and Behold..............When I opened my e-mail, there IT WAS!

A message from CCAI stating that my Dossier was sent to China 2 days ago. I didn't even realize it had gone to translation yet!

Im going to TRY not to wish away the next 6 months, but to enjoy the anticipation and preparation. I get to work on my nursery and 100 good wishes quilt, resume the china nights (if I dare), and start training to hike THE GREAT WALL for goodness sakes!

In honor of being DTC, I found a poem for you Amelia,

KISSES IN THE WIND

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.

You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are....whats taking us so long.

But remember child, I love you, and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin....

Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in his hands until I can be with you

I promise you, my baby, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend

But for tonight as always, I blow you kisses on the wind.

My God wrap you in his arms and hold you very tight.

And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.

----unknown

The Red Thread

An invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet,

regardless of time, place, or circumstance.

The thread may stretch or tangle, but it will never break.

-----ancient Chinese belief

The red thread has become the symbol of hope for parents adopting Chinese children. The reminder of mysterious workings in the universe, bringing people together across oceans to change the course of each others lives.

I like the idea of a loving and harmonious force guiding the red thread through time, space, and atmosphere, dodging stars and swirling clouds to connect my Chinese daughter to the place in my heart that waits.....And to that place in her heart that waits, although she surely doesn't realize what she's waiting for.

Amelia's first gift from her daddy was a white toy chest. Jimmy brought it home from work one day with a sheepish grin. Its a sweet little toy chest, just the right size for a toddler cherub and with safety latches on the lid.

I decided to paint the mysterious red thread finding its way from her heart to ours on the toy chest. I started with the earth surrounded by a swirling atmosphere and a drifting red thread.

Jimmy added the stars, and we'll finish with some highlighting, more stars, and by writing the red thread legend in calligraphy on the front.

side view of the famous red thread 

Amelia's toy chest painted with the red thread theme 

we're authentic!

My authenticated dossier came in the mail yesterday. woo hoo! or at least, the notification card arrived in my box. I had 15 minutes to get across Roswell to the main post office to pick it up (in five o'clock traffic) before closing. Wouldnt ya know it, I was 3 minutes too late. Now another girl might have sighed, and shrugged, and resigned herself to come back tomorrow. But not me. I got on the phone and pleaded with the postal workers to unlock the door. AND THEY DID! Is that customer service or what? What a feeling to see the translated authenications. Boy, is this starting to feel real!!!!!!!!! I'll be over at the post office today putting it all in the mail to CCAI (my agency) in Colorado(their headquarters) and they have 2 weeks to translate, bind, review, and send it to China.

Our children are not ours because they share our genes........ they are ours because we have the audacity to envision them. That, at the end of the day or a long sleepless night, is how love really works.

----unknown

Of all the rights of women.....

Hurry Up and Wait..........................The paper chase mantra.

Today is exactly a week to the day since I mailed my dossier to the Chinese Consulate in Houston. I am antsy. I keep thinking that since my 171 came so quickly, maybe the whole process will be "charmed" from here and the authentications will be just as fast.

But woe is me.....The process is what it is.... And I'm reminded that my dossier is no more important than any of the other thousands of people waiting on theirs.

I remember following this thread in the heat of infertility treatment. I kept praying for God to send me a child, and thinking that surely my prayer would be answered(to my satisfaction) since God and I have always been so tight. But then I didn't get (and stay) pregnant. I not only felt angry, but......Irate... Flabbergasted, offended, and in disbelief! But then I wondered why my reproductive problems should hold any more importance to God than someone else's?

Surely there were (and are) multitudes of women out there with empty wombs and empty arms. And if God loves us all equally and without "respect of persons" then perhaps mine was the ultimate arrogance to assume that my ovarian "issues" were more worthy of healing than all the other childless women in the world.

These days, I joyfully thank God(with nearly every breath I take) that I have a daughter waiting on me in China. Maybe, I have come to this path as a logical solution to an illogical problem. Or maybe....... This was God's plan all along. I've had to make peace with not knowing.

At any rate, I send the prayer and hope and longing out to God and all the universe for a speedy DTC (dossier to China) not just for me, but for us ALL.

Of all the rights of women, the greatest is to be a mother.

------Lin Yutang

It aint all its cracked up to be..........

When Jimmy and I first decided (officially decided, that is) to adopt from China, I came up with the great idea of having "China night". Caught up in my initial enthusiasm, I planned on having it EVERY Sunday night for the whole year while doing paperwork and waiting to travel. A traditional Chinese meal followed by learning about some aspect of Chinese history or culture etc. I went out and bought special dishes for the occasion, (red and black) lacquered chop sticks, tea set etc, red candles, etc.

The first menu was as follows:

Steamed Mushroom and Scallion Dumplings
phoenix Chicken
Mandarin Fried Rice
Chinese Long Beans (look like foot long green beans)
Fried Dough(kind of like do-nuts) with Rose flavored Sugar
Ginger Ice Cream

All homemade.....................can you imagine the condition of my kitchen after all that? Can you imagine MY CONDITION after all that??????????

So we sit down, eat the dinner (which was actually delicious with the exception of the long beans), talk about our China trip for about 10 minutes, and boom ....We're done. 4 hours of cooking, an hour of clean up.

Need I say we only did China night once?

My husband in his infinite wit, looked at me and said ......"China night......It aint all its cracked up to be huh?" I told him what he could do with the Chinese Long Bean.

Friends, Relatives, and Fellow Adoption travelers,
I am thrilled and STUNNED to announce that I received the "coveted" I-171H on Saturday, the 6th. As you may have gathered from my last post, I didn't expect to receive it for several more weeks. Everyday I stop by the mailbox hoping against hope that it will be there, but never ACTUALLY expecting it to have arrived yet! And there it was!

Timeline: Homestuday sent to USCIS on July 26th
Registered on the 27th
I-171H arrived in the mail on Aug. 6th

So off I go! I'm taking off work the rest of the day and I will walk all the dossier docs (Inc. The 171) through the county and state offices and express mail to Houston. Almost there.

To steal from (and mutilate) the words of the late William Shakespeare......

Hark! What light through yonder window breaks.... It is the east.....And *Amelia* is the sun.

(and the warmth of anticipation envelops me)

The Paper Chase

The Journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step....

-----Lao-tzu

"Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal......My strength lies in my tenacity-----Louis Pasteur

Why China? And other frequently asked questions

At the first orientation meeting I ever attended at CCAI ( my adoption agency--which is wonderful, by the way---see attached link) an opening comment was made that nearly stopped my heart. The agency director said....."You are now paper pregnant.......But instead of your belly growing out, your paper stack will grow up". It was BALM to my soul.

We have chosen to adopt a child from China because there are thousands upon thousands of baby girls in that country who have been relinquished by biological parents who were unable to care for them.

We need a child, and there is a little girl in an institution that needs a mom and dad. This for us is a match made in heaven, and I cant help but believe that God is smiling a crinkle eyed smile to see people on opposite sides of the planet meet the need for family in such an extraordinary way.

Keep a green bough in your heart

and the singing bird will come----Chinese Proverb

I confess, I cant take credit for the research to find this quote. I found it on someone else's Blog. But reading it is like a breath of fresh air to me.....as if I have been holding my breath for a really long time, and am suddenly gulping great swallows of air, drunk and swirling with oxygen and light.

I am waiting on my own singing bird........and I can no longer imagine my life without her. I recently commented to my husband that I already love her. Of course, I have never seen her. I dont know what province she lives in, how old she is, or if she has even been born.

My husband says...." You just love the idea of her" and I reply......Whats the difference?